My Response to the “23 Things To Do Instead of Getting Engaged Before 23” blog.

I’ve been noticing so much controversy going on Facebook lately. There’s been so much talk about a certain blog post on my “news feed” these past couple of weeks. Some praise, some flack. Married people seem to be responding to this blog, but I decided to give my insight on this post, even if I am single. πŸ™‚

The blog talking about is, “23 Things to Instead of Getting Engaged Before 23.” I’m sure everyone has heard of it or read it by now. If not, Google it.

I don’t know if I’m entitled to write my response to this blog, since I am 26 and I am single, but I’m going to talk, anyway.

My responses will be in BOLD print, by the way.

In the blog, the young lady begins by saying…

“As 2013 wraps up, I’ve been noticing more and more people getting engaged and/or married under the age of 23.
I get it.
It’s cold outside… you want to cuddle and talk about your feelings.”

Yes, I have noticed that more engagement rings, wedding photos, and pregnancy announcements have popped up on my “news feed,” but I don’t think that has anything to do with it being cold outside? O.o
I think it’s more that dating/engaged couples are ready for a transition into the next step of their lives, whether it happens on a rainy afternoon in April, or during 4th of July fireworks, or celebrating Christmas with family, or counting down to the New Year.

“Is there something wrong with me?”

No, there is nothing wrong with being single in your 20s. Society will tell you differently though.
I think everyone feels strange at least once when you’re single. You walk around the mall, and you see all the happy couples walking slowly past you, holding hands, giggling, whispering to each other, hugging and kissing.
And you know what? It is PERFECTLY OKAY for you to be happy for them, without feeling sorry for yourself. Seriously! You don’t have to throw a pity party every time you see a man & a woman in love. Be happy for them. They found each other at the right time. πŸ™‚
I love seeing a man and a woman make God the main essential part of their relationship. It’s beautiful. And whether or not I am meant to marry someday, my desire will be to find a man whose heart belongs to the Lord.

I noticed in the blog how the young lady wrote about how marriage at a younger age is a “cop-out” and is pretty much the easy way out.

I disagree.
I mean, my parents married when they were younger than what I am now, but that doesn’t mean they were “cop-outs” or that they were taking the easy way out. They were in love and they knew it was their time to get married. My mom had just graduated high school, and my dad had been out of high school for a couple years, and he started his “career” a couple years after, and it was a really good career for him and our family. Plus, I came along seven years after they married. πŸ™‚
But the plan my parents had would not have worked out for me. Getting married at 18 would’ve been way too overwhelming for me. Even getting married at 23, when I graduated college, still would’ve been too soon for me.
Everyone’s on their own path, and whether people get married at 18, 25, 30, 40, or even 60 years old, it should be the right time for them. And no, you’re not a “cop-out” if you marry young.

Finally, I thought I would look at the young lady’s “list of 23 things” and see I’ve done any of them…

1. Get a passport
Sounds lovely! I want to travel. I really want to go places! I’ve only been to a handful of places in the U.S., but I don’t have a passport. Usually you need to have money for those things, so even if I did get a passport right now in my life, it would be just sitting in a drawer, collecting dust.

2. Find your “thing.”
Oh, I’m in the process of doing that! I don’t think your “thing” is something you can discover overnight. I’ll let you know when I find my “thing.”

3. Make out with a stranger.
No, thank you.

4. Adopt a pet
Definitely want to someday! But not in my current apartment and my current situation. I want to be able to be able to afford to take care of the pet, silly.
And by the way, doesn’t #4 contradict #1? I mean, traveling around the world sounds totally and completely awesome, but I don’t think someone can travel the world and have a pet at home at the same time, can they?

5. Start a band.
No, thank you. But I would like to go see a band perform.

6. Make a cake. Make a second cake. Have your cake and eat it too.
Yum! This one I can do! Sounds like a fun project to do in 2014.

7. Get a tattoo. It’s more permanent than a marriage.
How do you know? Tattoos are ink. Marriage is a commitment. Just saying.
And actually, donating blood to the American Red Cross is more important to me right now. I donate every chance I can, and I’ll disqualify myself for 12 months if I get a tattoo.

8. Explore a new religion.
Tried it. It may work for other people, but nothing fulfills and gives me joy more than a relationship with my Lord, Jesus Christ.

9. Start a small business.
You never know, this could be a possibility for me someday. Obviously, I missed the “before 23” mark, but who knows where my degree can take me!?

10. Cut your hair
I think I did once when I was 5 years old? I think every kid has experimented with scissors… but the last time I got my hair cut was 2012. I’m due for another one soon.

11. Date two people at once and see how long it takes to blow up in your face.
I’ve seen Degrassi: The Next Generation episodes. I’ve seen 7th Heaven. I can tell just from those shows that it doesn’t take that long… and the one dating two people is the one who loses.

12. Build something with your hands.
I need to practice more adult projects! My projects always look juvenile.

14. Join the Peace Corps.
I want to do something life-changing this year! I know I’m 26, but I want to do something that makes a difference. I want to touch lives. I want to help people, I want to step outside my comfort zone! I don’t know if that necessarily means joining the Peace Corps, but I guess like Lee Ann Womack’s early 2000s song suggests, I want to have “something worth leaving behind” in my life.

15. Disappoint your parents.

16. Watch GIRLS, over and over again.
I’m not sure if I know what this means, exactly. Is GIRLS a T.V. show? Movie? If not, then, no thank you, I don’t need to watch them over and over.

17. Eat a jar of Nutella in one sitting.
I wasn’t impressed with Nutella. It’s an acquired taste. Now, give me a full bag of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, and I can’t guarantee they’ll be in the bag all week… or depending on the time, all day. Hee hee.

18. Make strangers feel uncomfortable in public places.
How? By staring at them? Following them? I don’t think I’d be comfortable doing that.

19. Sign up for CrossFit.
I’m not sure what CrossFit is, but it reminds me of exercise! And if it’s an exercise program, I do agree about committing to an a program of some kind. I’ve been slowly exercising again, but sometimes I think I would improve if I chose one of the local fitness centers around here… even if most of them are pricey. But I’ve heard it said that if you commit to one, you’re more accountable to attend more. I’ll come back to this.

20. Hang out naked in front of a window.
Umm… no, thanks! Even after signing up for CrossFit, I’m sure it would still be distrurbing.

21. Write your feelings down in a blog.
Doing that as we speak… or as I write.

22 Be selfish.
Been there, done that. It’s not worth it for the people you hurt from being selfish..

23. Come with me to the Philippines for Chinese New Year.
I don’t know you, first of all. And again, like I answered for #1, not able to. I hope you find a reliable pet-sitter though. πŸ˜‰

Well, that’s my response to the blog post. Like I said before, I’m not sure if I was entitled to respond to this blog, since I myself am single… I mean, the only responses I’ve read on Facebook are from married people.

And I have my own “to do list” that I want to cross off, and I don’t have a date on my things to do. I just want to do them before I leave this life, and hopefully I’ll get a chance to blog about what’s on my list, instead of dreaming about them. πŸ™‚


5 thoughts on “My Response to the “23 Things To Do Instead of Getting Engaged Before 23” blog.

  1. I’ve seen those articles. Clay and I are married and we do a lot of those things. You can still do many of them after marriage and with kids.

    I don’t agree with her list or her overall tone, but I do agree with the premise of doing what you want when you’re young. Or if you’re not young :). Maybe some people want to be married that young, and if so, good for them. It’s their life and maybe that’s their dream (this girl needs to realize not everyone has the same dreams as she does). We got married at 25 and for us, that was young enough.

  2. I like how you said everyone has a different dream! It’s true. And yeah, I have several things I want to do in my life… and I just hope to do accomplish them, whether I have a ring on my finger or whether I haven’t even met him yet. But hanging out by window naked isn’t really my dream.

  3. That blog post… GRRR… I have done some of those things… but I was young and stupid. I was 16 and 17 years old. I was married at 20. I married that “young” because I was in love. and… to us.. that really wasn’t “young” considering I wanted to get married at 17. I was pregnant twice before we ever got married, and we grew up and had little “adventures” before we married. I don’t regret any of it one bit. But yes… I have hung out of a window naked before… I was high and drunk and stupid. So no… that really wasn’t a dream of mine either… it just happened it happen.

    1. Married at 20 isn’t too young at all! It’s just that who I saw at that time in my life was not who I wanted to walk down the aisle with. I’m glad you found Chris! And I love seeing your photos of little Christopher. I’m hoping for nsome adventures this year… but it depends on the pocketbook… or inspirtation. I guess some adventures can be done on a tight budget.

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